Lauren O'Connell - I Would Rather Be Gone

I've spent time just figuring ways
Something more certain than just hoping you will stay
But what good is that
When it's so hard to tell
If I could give you anything
That you could not find better somewhere else
Help me out, help me out

I've tried to count the things I'd do
What I would change if I only knew how to
And I don't know why
But for better or worse
I can't shake this need I've got
For you to know exactly what I'm worth
Help me out, help me out

Is it all right to know that you're not better off?
Is it okay for me to wish that you were lonelier when I was gone?
‘Cause I’ve loved you the best that I know how
But I think I'm loving you wrong
And I would rather be gone

I grew up to find my heart open
And my hand held out like fate owed me something
But should I even want it
Like we’re all built to hold
Under the pressure that just comes along
With knowing that you're something somebody chose
Help me out, help me out

I just need somewhere to go
Some dirt to fill some holes and there are plenty
Of ways to get that done
It's just that I want little to do
With anybody who's not you
And I have noticed
That's almost everyone